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10.14.2001
boring babble
so, yes. this is first and foremost a place where i get to record my thoughts.. so, the following are somethings i'm thinking about.. its not all that interesting.
a) yes randy(my friend in eugene, not the bwg) you are right.. queen latifah is pretty cool...
last night randy i were talking about the "gangsta rap" music genre.. and about how its very violent and mysognistic.. i know a teenage girl who listens too it. randy suggested that i give her a queen latifah recording because she is very woman positive.. and she's close enough in sound that maybe this young person would listen too it and enjoy it. so, today i happened to be flipping the channels and saw queen latifah on mtv2.. i stopped and listened.... if i enjoyed rap even i might listen to her stuff..
b) the dixie chicks.. i only watched a bit of their concert on a major network. my cousin and aunt played their song wide open spaces for me my first xmas after i moved out here.. friday night they were on austin city limits on public television.. i stopped in on that channel.. and i didn't move it for their whole performance. yeah. southern women who look like they'd be waaaaaaay comfy in a pair of daisy-dukes and acting stupid for men up on stage singing about "premedidated first degree murder" of a wife beater. and their audience.. southern girls and southern mothers who i wouldn't expect to have anything in common with listening and cheering and singing along with these 3 women. it was quite fantastic. they sung a cheryl crow song-- they performed at lilith fair and had met her.. they commented that they were singing the song-- women influencing women, the way it should be. how could i not sit and listen? these women who have made their way into the pop sound of america standing up and being themselves-- themselves-- banjo pickin', fiddle playin', bass strummin' women who are very strident about being powerful women.
c) randy (my friend in eugene) came over yesterday and we started the great apartment clean. i'm not gonna say much more on that one except its nice to start. and janelle has offered to come over and help... she'll know this when she reads it: when we get to the scrubbing my friend.. yeah, how's that? we'll need your muscles :)
d) hopefully a part of the cleaning will be help putting the lower level of my bunkbed together.. then people can come visit. the upper level is a single bed.. the lowerlevel is a double bed.
e) yes, as lisa has given away my secret.. i am actually quite a nice person. and i do talk about things besides politics, feminism, mysogny and patriarchy. heh.
f) i'm having difficulty concentrating. i turned off the teevee and started the cd player.. alix olson is on the cd player.. thats what randy and i listened too yesterday. i always have difficulty concentrating with alix olson playing.. agh. and i'm too lazy to get up and put on the ani difranco ceedee i found yesterday.
g) does anyone know where i can get chris pureka's cd? who? if you've listened to built like that then you'll know who chris purkea is.. look in the cd notes.
h) i think i'm gonna start a new feature of this blog.. called patriarchy in everyday life.. eh? yeah yeah.. i know patriarchy is a part of the everyday life.. but starting to point it out in our everyday lives-- the before we get to the media.. huh?
i was reading a man's weblog today.. and in the comments he responded back to someone who didn't want to do something hard don't be such a pussy..
CAUGHT!
pussy: slang for vagina.
this person is using slang used to refer to a woman's body part to call someone else a whimp. women are seen as weak, so we use terms like that to make fun of people.
am i making sense? oh goodness.. i really should reach 3 feet over and put in ani..
i) i think i might go back to my psychiatrist, rick. my insurance has reset. and i've decided to not do accupuncture and instead of work with western medicine for awhile longer. he's quite good at what he does, and he's actually pretty nice. (see, i'm not totally anti-man) my pcp remarked when i saw her last monday that we need to get my disease in remission.. isn't that a fabulous way of putting it? maybe y'all who don't suffer from depression, or bad depression, will understand better..
j) heading to the post office tommorrow. finally. gonna get a request for some information in the mail and i'm sending a care package to the middle of the country. i hope they like what i'm sending their family.k) i think ava would really like to go back to the womb. i think smudge would not like that.
l) i found the kitty nail clippers. 2 down, 2 to go. i'm not gonna interrupt wombing ava though. i think that would be a bit too traumatic for her. i'll wait till she's done wombing....... llllllliiiiiiiillllllllllyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy......
k) should i worry that lily cat has a major sweet tooth? she loves anything sweet. re: honey, candy, pop tarts, cotton candy, etc..
l) i gotta call tommorrow and make an appointment for smudge to get de-testicled. they are growing.. bigger and bigger each week. its about that time little kitten..
m) i took some pictures of flowers at the owen rose garden. one or 2 turned out okay. i'll try to get them posted.
n) fyi.. peggy noonan was a speech writer for g. bush #1. a lot of republican women, esp. women that republican are anti-woman. i know, i know.. how can a woman be anti-woman? *sigh* i dunno either.
o) plans for the day. women's caucas. costco. sapphic salon @ mother kalis? bath taken. food eaten. 3 out of 4 cat nails clipped. hopefully tommorrow, after work, i'll go find that beginning band methods 1 book. the methods 3 book, well, its all in the upper registers and i can't play there yet. b flat clarinet.
p) yes.. it is easier to concentrate with ani on and not alix.
q) the womb sneezed! and then moved about some.. and then stopped moving. i guess ava isn't ready to come out yet. thats fine. she enjoys it, she finds it peaceful, thats all i care about. yes, ava is my most emotinally needy cat.. i'm not sure whats up with her, but she is very admant about being close too me, she goes into the bathroom and makes pitiful sounds till i call her and she comes to cuddle with me.
r) silver-- good luck with that kitten. hopefully she'll bring y'all as much joy as smudge has brought me.
s) s for sweet aspirations.. jann lost a dear dear friend last week. as i was reading her post about it, i had a dear dear friend in my chest. i cried. i lost a dear friend of 20 years 3 years ago. i remember driving down the highway sometime after i got to oregon.. i looked up into the sky and could feel her presence. it was an amazing feeling. i don't believe in a specific religion, but i do believe the spirits of those gone are around us. there are times when i can feel my grandfather.. and katy. i've not felt my grandmother yet, but i've a feeling she's hanging around my grandfather (the one that is still alive).. he needs her more than i do. so, jann.. i hope you feel what i feel about these spirits gone from this plane..
t) that just made me realize.. december 12th will be not only kathy's birthday, but the first anniversary of my grandmother's death. december 5th is dad's birthday.. december 7th is will be the 7th anniversary of me coming out publicly.. something grand needs to happen sometime in those two weeks. yes. a celebration of life gone, a celebration of life moving on and a celebration of starting life from a new vantage point. hmm.. maybe by then my apartment will be clean.. hmm.. wouldn't that be fabulous? i'll have that as a goal.. and then we'll also have something else to celebrate. yes yes yes.
okay. enough boredom. time to find shorts, bra, leggings and a long sleeved shirt.
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